Lycanthropy is not so difficult to relate to, in that silly romanticized way you find it in the fics, anyhow. To paraphrase a bit of television logic (oh, you all know the line of course) there are a few days a month when I am boneless and I want to just keep my own company, and the the scent of freshly mown grass isn't pleasant, it's nauseating. I feel like I should probably eat something, but can't quite bring myself to do it. And I listen to sad sappy silly things, Adam Duritz at the moment (oh yes, I never do anything halfway you know) and get rather philosophical. It's about the same I am when I get extremely drunk, now how's that for a thought.

Today is a day like that, except that I bought myself my first cell phone plan and the exact phone I wanted yesterday (can't believe they accepted a student card!) It was the musical one, and I am so desperately pleased to finally have a decent music program on my computer (came at a great price with the phone!) and a lovely portable sort of listening device. I just can't be down about anything. Not the broken cars, not the huge disagreement I'm in with Alice, none of it.

Still, it doesn't stop me from looking up the myspace profiles of ex boyfriends and being amazed. In one particular case, the one from theatre class last year, I am the exact opposite really of what he describes his ideal girl as. I can't imagine why he ever started it up with me at all, unless I was just there and he didn't realize what a bad fit it was until so much later...I'll bet that is part of it. That, and I laughed at something tragic in his life because I thought it was a joke and I don't know why because no one, no one, no one ever tells that as a joke. But he has such an off sense of humor that I thought it was. Oof. I never did get the apology to come out right, with that. And then he was in Japan, only that's what I was told but it wasn't true apparently. He was in Texas, and he still is.

Anyhow, he's not the one I've been sighing wistfully over. (;

I'll make the next one a little more poetic, this is just me putting down random thoughts that have no other place to be, and I thought I'd better do it before I get melancoly and over-dramatic. Ah, you know how it is.

Tags: lycanthropy, pastloves
Current Location: daydreaming, as ever.
Current Mood: sore
Current Music: see above!

Setting: One of those last, loveliest muggy-sweaty days in mid September before the crispness of autum finally sets in. Dusk.

Her father opens the bedroom door up (he never does knock, no matter how often he's asked to) and says something about the car being broken down again. She says something rather snappy and pretends to do homework until he leaves again. Stupid cars, stupid cars. That meant he would need hers in the morning, and though it was such a small sort of sacrifice, if it could even be called that, she hated it anyhow.

She went out the back door and brought the rest of her school books inside, while her father drank his coffee on the front porch, as was suited to a man who lived on top of a little hill. He said something to her, though he never did speak loudly enough in those situations, so she pretended not to have noticed. She hadn't heard him, honestly, so it wasn't such a stretch.

When she came back into her room and dumped the books onto the floor, her father's voice came from outside her window (the front porch was just there) and she switched the light off as she put her shoes on. She went out the back door just as her father came in the front, trying to talk to her face to face. As she started her car and put it into reverse, her father came back out the front door and made an aggreived face in the glow of her taillights. It was seamless, really. As she drove down the road, inside of her head she was crowing to herself over the brilliance of this silly little bit of trickery. Around her the hills were pretty dark shapes and the clouds in the sky were smudges of violet and plum.

She met her darling ellusive recluse-y brother for coffee and fried ravioli, where they talked of languages, religion, cars, sicilian restaurant owners, and other silly such things. It was a lovely evening, even though she really ought to have been studying for her lab test in astronomy class (which so far had very little to do with the heavens at all.)

Ah well, she thought to herself at the end of it all, she would get right to that. After she read over one more nearly slashy little saccharine caninie fic. Then she could get down to the studying.

Hello, Live journal. Pleased to make your infamous acquaintance at long last.

Tags: coffees
Current Location: home sweet home
Current Mood: amused
Current Music: youmakemereal - for silly dancing to get rid of all her extra energy